May 2020

Posted on by Wes Modes
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Social Distancing

Cover illustration by Cheyenne Goddard.

Here’s a link to Cheyenne’s art .

Are you an illustrator? Want to submit the next cover? Here’s the deets .

Contributed by Oddworld
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(This thing is among the most liked in this issue)
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GRAMPY TRUMPS MIRACLE CURE

GRAMPY TRUMP AND SON’S FISHTANK CLEANER AND MIRACULE CURE

Contributed by Cam
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The Amazing Decision-Maker

Need to make a decision? From the trivial to the monumental, the Amazing Decision-Maker uses science and magic combined. It mines the depths of your psyche to discover the decision that you already made.

The Decision Maker will help you make a decision by organizing what you already know. You’ll need a little info about your decision like, your options, the considerations that influence your decision, and the importance of each of these considerations.

Make a Decision!

https://modes.io/the-amazing-decision-maker/
Contributed by wmodes
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I hate that bitch Mayor Carolyn Goodman

mayor carolyn goodman of las vegas wants to re-open the entire city in the middle of a god damn pandemic because she doesn’t believe in fucking science. Also remember how she had the city’s homeless sleep in painted boxes in a parking lot outside of completely empty hotels? i sure haven’t forgotten. i don’t want my family to die. like this post if you think she should get the corona virus.

this lady's an idiot!

https://www.cnn.com/videos/politics/2020/04/22/las-vegas-mayor-carolyn-goodman-reopen-coronavirus-entire-interview-anderson-cooper-sot-nr-vpx.cnn
Contributed by andimellonofficial
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All Bats Are Terrific…

Now more than ever… ABAT! – ALL BATS ARE TERRIFIC // ALL BILLIONAIRES ARE TRASH – Pass it along. from https://www.facebook.com/rhydd.arch.7

Contributed by invalid
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500 Server Error

The server encountered an internal error or misconfiguration and was unable to complete your request.

Please contact the server administrator, webmaster@unavoidabledisaster.com and inform them of the time the error occurred, and anything that you might have done to cause the error.

More information about this error may be available in the server error log. You might also look up the wikipedia entry for Grace Hopper.

She's one of the earliest programmers and actually found a moth wedged in a relay of an early computer. She taped the moth into the server log. So that's where the term "bug" comes from. Which I thought was cool. You can actually see an image of the moth taped in the log.

Did I tell you I met her one time? Grace Hopper. My dad was working at the Naval Postgraduate School and I was a nerdy 13 year-old hanging around the server room. He came in with a bunch of people in uniform and an older lady wearing a classic naval lady's pillbox hat. My dad said, "This is Grace Hopper," and I didn't realize who she was until later. Anyway...

Contributed by Apache/2.0.54 Server at unavoidabledisaster.com Port 80
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Alan Brady seed outlaw

Contributed by radtime
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Wear a Mask

WEAR A MASK
and save your life!

Contributed by bigbaby
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Dead Drop PanPals (pandemic pals)

A dead drop or dead letter box is a method of espionage tradecraft used to pass items or information between two individuals using a secret location, thus not requiring them to meet directly and thereby maintaining operational security. In the time of plague, we could make dead drops of: letters, small items of interest, collages, photos, etc. Follow all possible contagion-avoidance methods (prepare your drop item with gloves on; place it in plastic so the recipient can get it home and open it with vector control protocols). With your pal, set a drop schedule and locale, then make a package, tape it under some bench or put it beneath a public planter somewhere or stick it in a hole in a tree, then your recipient can come pick it up. Don’t let anyone see you! Don’t run into each other! This is spy shit! Be sneaky.

Show love to your PanPals

http://aulinta.net
Contributed by Fuze
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Joyce loved her BBQ!

I found this photo in an antique shop in Centralia, WA

Contributed by Hank!
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Car Wreck

From a Los Angeles photo album I bought in Fresno, I think.

Contributed by Hank!
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Sleep

Contributed by Cam
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Found rubber gloves and mask

I found your lost gloves and mask! Somehow you lost them both in the parking lot of Frenchys on Portola and 41st avenue. I took the necessary precautions and covered my face neck and hands with thieves oil before picking up your lost items. I have them in a safe place now! How can I get them back to you? Surely you are missing them and vulnerable to the spooky coughs and sneezes that will be everywhere in a few days. Please wear a scarf around your mouth and nose until we get these back to you. Maybe you have some garden gloves that you can wear? I’d use those until you get these ones back. Stay safe! Stay indoors unless you must go out for more smut, lube and pizza!

stop littering!

Contributed by Finder
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History is Gay

It didn’t start with Stonewall in 1968, often considered the beginning of the gay rights movement. More than 50 years earlier, Harlem’s famous drag balls were part of a flourishing, highly visible LGBTQ nightlife and culture. Even in the late 19th century, queer and gender non-conforming men were increasingly visible. By the 1920s, gay men had established a presence in Harlem and the bohemian mecca of Greenwich Village, and the city’s first lesbian enclaves had appeared in Harlem and the Village.

https://www.history.com/news/gay-culture-roaring-twenties-prohibition
Contributed by wmodes
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People who aren’t social distancing

Contributed by McButter
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Help the Santa Cruz Hub Survive!

The Santa Cruz Hub for Sustainable Living is a constellation of community-based projects that has been building and celebrating community and offering crucial resources since 1994. We are currently closed for community safety, and rather than have each individual project at the Hub shoulder the burden for rent alone, we are focused on a collective effort to raise rent/expenses all together, and we’re asking you to help us with that! https://charity.gofundme.com/o/en/campaign/rent-for-the-hub-for-sustainable-living

Projects like The Fábrica, SubRosa, The Bike Church, PedX Courier & Cargo, Hard Core Compost Company, Tenant Sanctuary, and Sanctuary Santa Cruz all call the Hub home, with offerings spanning from community and legal support for immigrants, to work trade in exchange for a bike for low income riders, to compost pickup at your door every week. Projects of the Hub also offer a vibrant environment for events, classes, meetings, organizing, performance, art, studying, and so much more (read more about our project offerings here http://www.santacruzhub.org/projects-of-the-hub.html ).

Due to the Covid-19 crisis, Hub on-the-ground operations are completely shut down for the safety of the community. Many of the Hub’s projects are currently or will soon be struggling to pay the bills, particularly those projects which rely upon small cash donations from public-engaging programs. We are fundraising to account for rent/expenses at this unpredictable time.

As we come to realize it is very difficult to predict how long we are likely to be closed, we have determined that our need is greater than expected – and so the fundraiser reflects that

In addition to this crowdfunding campaign, please let us know if you have ideas of grant funding or if you would be willing to become a sustaining member of the Hub for as little as $5/month.

Our lease is up in October, and we are starting to have the conversation with the landlord to renew. So, depending on how that goes, we may begin a larger fundraising campaign later this year if we have to move to either rent or purchase a new property to continue offering these crucial resources to the Santa Cruz community. We appreciate any community involvement in supporting our continued resilience, whether that be financial or simply sharing about us and what we do.

We recognize we are one of infinite groups seeking funding during this time. If you only have a small amount of money to donate to Covid-19 relief, we encourage donating first and foremost to least-resourced groups (undocumented workers not receiving government checks, houseless folks in need of housing, etc). If you have the means, please consider donating to the Hub after and in addition to supporting these urgent needs.

The Hub Community Center is located in downtown Santa Cruz, CA, which is the unceded territory of the Awaswas-speaking Uypi Tribe. The Amah Mutsun Tribal Band, comprised of the descendants of indigenous people taken to missions Santa Cruz and San Juan Bautista during Spanish colonization of the Central Coast, is today working hard to restore traditional stewardship practices on these lands and heal from historical trauma. More information http://amahmutsun.org

Support the Hub!

https://charity.gofundme.com/o/en/campaign/rent-for-the-hub-for-sustainable-living
Contributed by Hubster
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Dirges and Laments

Contributed by bigbaby
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I WANTSS THEM

Will do untoward things for garlic scapes. Unhh. So good. Are you growing them? I am not growing them. But I wants them. Have I mentioned I have all the gelatin you need? We could trade. Seriously I have like one pound of ready-to-mix gelatin, you punk. Give me your scaaaapes

Art borrowed from th0rrrrr dcozpta-pre

Email meee

Contributed by Pippeh
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What Sucks More? You Tell Me!

You think you know what sucks? Care to put your ego where your id is?
WHATSUCKSMORE.us pits your suck list against the sucky things of others.
Battles! Ranks! See WHAT SUCKS MORE!

Click to battle...

http://whatsucksmore.us
Contributed by meritMedia
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Call for Art – Collecting Jars of Fucks

“What does a jar of fucks look like?”
THIS IS A JAR FOR YOUR FUCKS is the name of a community-sourced art project that invites you to explore this question by filling jars with things you give a fuck about, the moments you said the f-word, times you got f-ed over, and things you just can’t give a fuck about anymore.
Follow on Instagram – @this.is.a.jar

Go to the website

http://carminaeliason.com/jar-of-fucks
Contributed by Carmina Eliason
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Delivery truck arrived!

I scanned this from a photo album from Los Angeles.

Contributed by Hank!
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You Should Smoke

In case you were thinking of quitting, or not starting at all. Don’t put up with irritating hayfever or asthma — start smoking today!

A Public Service Message from Marshall’s Prepared Cigarettes.

Contributed by Marshall's Machine Rolled Cigarettes Company, Ltd.
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A Brief History of the ‘Danse Macabre’

In the Danse Macabre, or Dance of Death, skeletons escort living humans to their graves in a lively waltz. Kings, knights, and commoners alike join in, conveying that regardless of status, wealth, or accomplishments in life, death comes for everyone. At a time when outbreaks of the Black Death and seemingly endless battles between France and England in the Hundred Years’ War left thousands of people dead, macabre images like the Dance of Death were a way to confront the ever-present prospect of mortality.

Skeletons have been dancing people to their graves since at least 1424

https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/danse-macabre-david-pumpkins-art-history
Contributed by wmodes
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Psychological Operations and Obedience

Information travels fast these days. too fast for some, fast enough for most. In the time that we live there is a battle for the minds. What tribe do you subscribe to? What colors do you wear? Radio, podcasts, churches, self help groups, etc. If we are united we are strong, and if we are divided we are weak and easily controlled. The playbook today is to keep us separated and not united. From a very young age we are forced to choose our “favorites”. From food to color to toys and friends. To have a favorite means to discard or think lesser of all but one. This is how we are programmed early to discriminate. Now lets look at our current situation with the Covid 19 swirling around the world making people sick, and some dying. Don’t wear masks, now wear masks. Stay home, Don’t touch your face. Keep your distance. Wear gloves. Only go out for groceries and weed. Exercise is ok, but don’t go to the beach. Stand up, sit down, jump through hoop, roll over. Obey. Is the virus as lethal as they say it is? Or is this a Psyops experiment? Maybe both? A perfect opportunity to scare the masses into obedience and control? Psyops is military shorthand for psychological operation. Our cell phones track our every move (if you carry it with you) and so are our close interactions with other cellphone users. Naughty or nice? They can tell (they being the watchers, artificial intelligence.) when we are within 6 feet of someone that is not in our family. Shelter in place means dont go out for anything but essentials. The amount of time we are not home and the number of people we are coming withing 6 feet is being counted. Okay now bare with me as I consider how 5G comes into play. Imagine that if you are very naughty every day by ignoring the rules and going out and having close contact with friends. Can 5G be focused? Can it be concentrated? Sent to phones? Will all the naughty people get and extra dosage of it over time? Or maybe the ones that speak out and try to educate the people will get an extra dosage. Who gets to live? Who gets to die? We are going to be losing newspapers and news sources. Who are we going to be able to trust? Landlord will be pitted against renters, masked against the unmasked, those that tow the line and those that ignore it. And are we supposed to hate on Chinese now because Dolt 45 thinks he has a better name for the virus? Stay sane, stay human! Keep thinking! Dont believe the hype. I’m not sure what to believe, but I’m going to continue to think creatively.

Keep asking questions.

https://sofrep.com/news/the-history-of-u-s-psyops-part-1-the-beginning/
Contributed by Finder
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The Paradox of Tolerance

Yes, it is just this simple.

Anyone who tries to “catch” you in a “contradiction” because you are not tolerant of people who would use force to silence you are would-be fascists who should get a punch in the mouth.

Make Fascists Afraid Again

https://libcom.org/library/resources-starting-antifascist-group
Contributed by wmodes
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Demand to Live
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Don’t Beg to Work, Demand to Live!

Contributed by jdaniels
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Yeast, gelatin, starter for barter

Oh my gosh, you guys, in a woozy fit we bought Costco amounts of active dry yeast, which is more than my household has ever/will ever use in our combined lifetimes, but it was only because we couldn’t find single family-scale amounts at the store-stores. So we divvied into 8-use amounts and vacuum packed most of it & froze it for later/you. Also my husband bought a 1 lb tub of gelatin for why? Why? Are you panic-preserving and/or baking but lack these key supplies? Then by all means LET US TRADE. Whatchoo got. We could use a muffin tin, for some reason we do not have one. Or, we’ll take seedling overages. Contact me to compare notes and arrange proper social distance swap. Yes, we have sourdough starter too.

Activate swap process

Contributed by Pippeh
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Me

Closeup of a photo I bought in Centralia, WA.

Contributed by Hank!
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Friends don’t let friends drink bleach

Jesus saves! At least the good wine for himself, when everyone else is drunk 🙃

Contributed by Dingleberry
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A Dessert Flowchart

Is it dry “ass cake” or “dry ass” cake?

Technically it makes no difference. You walk up to the buffet. There are three desserts, a dry “ass cake”, a “dry ass” cake, and a scrumptious fruit pie. Which do you pick?

Let's talk about this

Contributed by wmodes
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Safety-tip: Clean your hair dryer

Lint and hair can collect in your hair dryer’s filter creating a fire hazard. Allowing the fan to push water through the mechanism will remove dangerous lint and hair. Carefully submerge hair dryer while running in clean clear water without soap.

Contributed by UAD Safety Committee
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Freedom

(O’ ‘O)
  ^^^

Contributed by _Benz
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A cookie is a small sweet cake, typically round, flat, and crisp, though significant variations exist. According to the Online Slang Dictionary, ‘cookie’ is also an euphemism for the female sexual organs.

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If you wish to enhance your user experience by receiving cookies, you should get some. They’re pretty good (though not as good as pie). However, if you do not wish to receive cookies, you should tell your Aunt Sally who tends to bake them at Christmastime.

Contributed by unavoidabledisaster
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Squatchin’ that Curve

Be a Hero, not a Zero! Stop hoarding that TP, binch.

Contributed by _Benz
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Your child needs a special laxative!

Your child needs a special laxative…

Contributed by bigbaby
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Railway Men

Contributed by bigbaby
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